One of my favorite discoveries in 2011 was a new-to-me author who combines snappy writing, sarcastic humor, and a dollop of romance in his witty short stories. (My other favorite discoveries in 2011 are Trader Joe's Dark Chocolate Lovers 85% Cacao Bar and the Etsy site. More on those later!).
Back to RJ. He's an alien. He's hilarious. And he has a book with the word "penis" in the title. Since I have a penchant for reading train wrecks (can you say Bearotica?) I immediately jumped at the chance to read The Princess and The Penis, thinking it would be excellent fodder for a train wreck post. Little did I know.... it was cute, funny and a hysterical satire of the romance genre.
Following that unexpected discovery, I quickly read RJ's other stories...The Ballerina, The Gymnast and The Yoga Master, and his latest story, My Third-World Girlfriend. I also started stalking following him on Twitter, at Goodreads, on Facebook, and sending him disturbing fan mail complimentary emails.
Since he hasn't taken out a restraining order yet, I think he likes me!
RJ was gracious enough to answer a few questions for me today. And he is offering all my readers a totally cool freebie. You can download The Ballerina, The Gymnast and The Yoga Master (my favorite!) for free at Smashwords....use this coupon: CA54Q. Thanks, RJ!
Here's my Interview With RJ......
1. What is the funniest thing you’ve ever read? Snorting out loud, embarrassing yourself in a public place sort of funny?
My last divorce settlement was pretty funny, in a cup-your-hands-over-your-face , crying sort of way. Joseph Heller’s Catch-22 was pretty good, too, perhaps because it helped me better understand what happened in the settlement.
2. Micro-brew from Vermont or Budweiser?
Micro-brew from Vermont. There’s nothing I love more than an adventure with an unpredictable ending.
3. If you had to join one reality TV show, what would it be?
Lost. I know it only aired for a season or two, but I feel as if I’m still filming.
4. What’s the coolest place you’ve ever lived?
Downtown Bangkok. Such a bustling, energetic place. The fact I didn’t have a job for the year seemed to help, too.
5. What’s the best color combination? A.) Blue and White B.) Navy and Orange C.) Black and Gold ....Follow-up question….How many terrible towels do you own?
Black and Gold, of course. But, actually, I don’t own any terrible towels. I try not to own anything anymore, mainly because it makes a quick escape so much easier.
6. What’s the wackiest fan comment you’ve ever received?
One woman insisted I write about a vagina (hence my post, The Vagina Conundrum). Thankfully, I’m in a meaningful relationship, otherwise that might have spurred another 25 years of in-depth research.
7. Do you plan to write any other books about penises? Just wondering.
No, but I am working on a story involving testicles. It’s about twins.
8. What’s the best “I just fucked up and have to get my girlfriend a suck-up gift” purchase? A) Flowers B) Candy C) 25 karat diamond tiara D) All of the above, and a new SUV wouldn’t be a bad idea either
Surprisingly, it was a new SUV. Not very smart, considering that woman had just run over her husband multiple times in Houston.
9. Any special care for your antenna? Conditioners? Hair mousse? Does your girlfriend try to put a bow on it….sort of like a yorkie? See photo below….
I don’t know what she does with my antenna, but sometimes, when I wake up, the top of my head is sore. As for special care, no. It’s up there in the fresh air and the sunshine, with no folds or crevices to worry about, so it pretty much takes care of itself.
10. If someone had to play you in a movie, who would it be?
Jack Nicholson, hands down. He’s been crazy (One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest), had serious women problems (The Witches of Eastwick), and has firsthand experience working with Aliens (Mars Attacks). Jack, call me.
For anyone looking for a quick, funny, clever, well-written story, I recommend any of RJ's books...
The Princess And The Penis
The Ballerina, The Gymnast and The Yoga Master (use coupon CA54Q)
My Third-World Girlfriend
Also, check out his website and blog....he has some hilarious posts! And all of the adorable cartoons are done by Scott Fiander.
Well, I'm off to wave my terrible towel and guzzle down a Magic Hat #9. Please leave a comment for RJ and say hi!
Penelope
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